Program Addresses Gender Differences

  "If I Were a Boy"

By Jocelyn Jones

            The Elite Ladies of The Epsilon Lambda Chapter of Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority Inc. hosted the program "If I Were a Boy" to learn more about gender roles.

            With a hilarious opening by Jennifer Wood and Heather Davis they performed a scene where Heather was going to set her up with a good guy. When the guy came up Jennifer knew that he was going to run game on her. So she took the incentive to "carry" him numerous times and he just wanted to tell her that she had toilet paper on her shoe.

            It was said that 60 percent of women assume that men are trying to pursue them on a romantic level, while 30 percent say that they are not trying to pursue them on a romantic level (Essence Magazine).

            This program consisted of role reversals (girls plays the guys & vice versa) and questions followed by responses from both parties (with the males on one side and the females on the other side of the room).   

            There were a series of questions displayed on an index card and a few scenes that had to be acted out using role reversal. One of the questions was why are guys/girls afraid to show affection (saying I love you) in front of their friends? The ladies said that guys feared burning their bridges with other females if they appeared to commit themselves to one woman. They also wondered if the guy is ashamed of their significant other, asking "If you can do it in private, why not do it in public?" The gentlemen said that guys they do it just to have sexual relations with a woman, and they don't mean what they says in public. They also feel as though showing affection and saying "I love you" are two different things.

            How would you feel if you saw your significant other walk out of Christa McAuliffe Residential Community at 3 a.m.?

The gentlemen said that the females overreact more than they should and that nine times out of ten they are in there with some friends. They can be playing Madden, NFL or even studying and it's because were in college and that they don't have set curfews. The campus is not but so big and if a female was to overreact then everyone would know their business. The guys feel that they should pull them to the side. What is a relationship without trust? There could be some trust issues and the males feel like it is all about the emotions and feelings that come out first and not thinking with your head.

            So your girl is in the Wiseman "bunned" up with some dude watching the big screen, what would you do?

The guys do not want to embarrass themselves because someone would get carried in front of everyone. Most gentlemen would just walk by and make sure that she sees them but then again if there is no title and there is no claim on their so called relationship then there are no worries.

            If you're outside and you see your significant other and you decided to "hit them up" but they screen your phone calls when they don't know you are looking right at them, how would you react?               

Various ladies said that there is some sort of suspiciousness going on and would not want to embarrass themselves but they would confront them or just casually walk by making sure the guys sees them, leaving them confused. It just the common curiosity to at least answer and say I will call you right back.

Various gentlemen said that it depends on what they are doing and the situation. It's just a phone call, so you shouldn't press the issue and sometimes batteries die and they might not want to use their day-time minutes and might not feel like talking to them at the moment.

            How would you feel if your spouse was going through your phone?

The guy's perspective is that ladies always say that it's just a friend (or a friend I knew before you). Both parties agreed that if you're finding certain things in their phone then you are not at that point in your relationship where there is trust. If you are checking someone's phone then you need to fall back and the relationship needs to be over. If you snoop then you will find and you are only going to hurt yourself in the process.

            Both parties also feel like males and females cannot be friends. If that is the case then they had probably already slept together, one person is unattractive or homosexual and like it or not someone has a like to somebody but they just don't show it and various games or jokes that are played are more than you think.

            What if you were talking to someone for a few months whether it is a guy or girl and you slept together and three weeks go by and there is no phone call, but you see them as you are walking into the Wiseman?

The males said that they were not their girl to begin with so they can't overreact and that it was mutual and they chose to do it. They also feel that just like shopping is an addiction to females that sex is the same way.

The ladies said that when the guy opens his mouth and says something nice or some kind of excuse that she falls for it all over again and that it is a continuing cycle. Both males and females feel like it is a double standard because there are some males that fall for the girl and she ends up not calling him. It's a fact of life and everyone does it. It has been said that females think that they can change a male. If they were the same way when they met them then there was something that had caught your eye whether it be their look or their swag, there was an attraction so why try to change it. Then again sometimes it is not the female that is changing the man but the man is changing themselves and or better themselves just because or it could be due to an inspiration.

            In the end, the males and females learned a lot about one another and got everything out in the open. Questions were answered that no one had the guts to say. The males and females also learned about each other's differences and how each one would react and how to change it and more about each of their feelings.