How to Survive an Opposing Team’s Tailgate Party
By Samantha Scott
You’ve been invited to the ultimate fan tailgate party by one of your closest friends. Free food, free drinks, big screen TV and free food. This is the ultimate fan party, how could you turn this down? The only problem is that the party you’ve been invited to is being hosted by a fan of the opposing team. Now you have a rough decision to make. Should you stay at home and watch the game by yourself, disappoint your friend, and remain unharmed? Or should you go to the party and NOT have a good time? Don’t fret. Here are a few pointers to not only enjoy the party, but leave with all of your limbs intact!
1. DO NOT, I repeat DO NOT wear your team’s jersey!
I know, I know. For true football fans this is the ultimate stab in the back. However, if you want to make it out of this party alive, don’t wear the jersey.
2. Drink, but not too much!
This is a party; so naturally, people are going to be drinking. Everyone knows that when people get a few drinks in them, their true feelings come out and they lash out at the people they dislike. On this day, that person is YOU! Out of all the people in the room, you need to be the most alert. So have a drink, but not to the point where you are unaware of what’s going on around you, just in case you need to dodge a few punches.
3. Keep the cheering to a minimum!
Scratch that, do not cheer at all! Remember, you are the opposition. Therefore if you are cheering, that means something bad has happened for the other team. As the enemy, you want to do as little as possible to attract attention to yourself. So, yelling “TOUCHDOWN” very loudly after your team just took the lead may not be the best idea.
4. Be the last to eat!
On this day, you are the bottom feeder, literally. This pointer is pretty self-explanatory. Under no circumstance should you direct your feet toward the buffet table before everyone else has a plate in their hand! Just to be on the safe side, wait until you see a couple of other people go up for seconds, then make your move. Be smart; you’re already dealing with angry fans; hungry, angry fans are not a good combination!
5. Never acknowledge the other team’s mistakes!
You’re watching the game and the other team fumbles the ball. You get the urge to cheer, but you refrained. Good for you! However, it is not wise for you to point out the reasons why the other team fumbled. Be smart; leave well enough alone!
6. After the game, leave immediately!
This is the most important rule in attending an opposing tailgate party, especially if your team has won the game. Angry drunk fans will want to take their anger out on someone in the room. If you stay, you will be that person! As soon as the game clock hits 00:00, you should be walking towards the door. Thank the host only if he/she is within eyesight of the door, and even then, do not make a move towards them. At this time, hugs are inappropriate; simply gesture toward them making a “call me” sign with your hands. Attending the opposition’s tailgate party can be risky, however; if you follow these few tips, you are sure to survive what could have turned in to a fatal attraction!